Desirous (An Excerpt)

That woman had the most unpropitious timing, or maybe her timing was calculated. She was unbelievably smart, no doubt.  Incredibly persuasive and I would be remised if I didn’t add manipulative. I couldn’t help but wonder if her unfavorable timing was measured.  

As I entered my home, the glow of the television unnerved me. I wasn’t one for watching television and I definitely wouldn’t leave it on in my absence. The volume was muted, but it was the luminescence which spilled from the screen and decorated the nearby wall which had warned me.

I drop my bags on the floor and removed my shoes before stepping outside the foyer. I followed the lighting and turned the corner as I was greeted with a routine, “Hey hun.”

My uncertainty dissolved as I replied absently, “Hey.”

Sensing my displeasure he inquired, “Long day?”

One of the absolute longest, I mused, but I replied with a nonchalant, “Same as always.”

Neglecting our usual greeting which was complimented by a kiss on the cheek, I walked past him and the television stating, “I’m going to call it a night.”

The declaration paused him and it wasn’t until I was halfway to our bedroom when he replied, “Okay. Goodnight.”

Entering the bedroom I began unfastening my blouse, exposing my breast and the black bra which supported them.

 I felt stained and unclean, comparable to person who had just committed a heinous act. Like a cop who engaged in their first act of defiance. Or a once polished woman who exploited her body. My challenge was not that I had aroused the interest of a coworker, but that the feeling was reciprocal.

My crime was minimal, yet the weight of it compelled me to cleanse my sins.

I turned the chrome knob and water cascaded through the shower head sprout.

I continued to strip my clothing, until I was bare and I tiptoed across to cold tiled floor and through the thick glass shower enclosure.

The hot water scolded me, still I turned the temperature higher. The scorching heat reassured me that I would be thoroughly sanitized.  Most importantly the scolding water would discourage my hands from seeking pleasure. It still throbbed, enticing me to ride the thrill of ecstasy, but I was in control. I would not be controlled. 

Stepping out of the shower I slipped on my satin kimono. I loved the feel of the fabric on my warm skin. I laid in bed nearly an hour, chasing the cool areas of my satin sheets with my feet. A few times I rolled over to Mark’s side of the bed since he hadn’t yet retired for the night. The heat radiating from my body had become uncomfortable. It made me restless, but mostly it made me desire Maria.

Rest. Relaxation. Self-Stimulation. (An Excerpt)

The evening neared to an exhausting close as I filed new patient correspondence. I had long abandoned my heels and stood with my weight shifted to my left hip as I organized.  I sighed observing the stacked pile of paperwork on my desk. I had delayed this process too long and now it would be a very long night.

Alisa poked her head in my office and yelled, “Goodnight Ms. Kelly.”

I turned unbalanced and echoed a goodnight as she retreated. She offered to stay later than the two hours she’d already committed, but I insisted she go home. The mess was mine to clean, by result of pure avoidance and procrastination.

I needed a minute to relax my feet, they ached from the constant walking throughout the day and prolonged standing as I organized. I stepped under my office doorframe and yelled, “Hello?”

I waited patiently for a response. Again, I questioned, “Hello.”

Still no one answered.

The coast was clear, I could rest awhile. Sitting in my burgundy leather office chair, I propped my feet atop the desk and reclined. Relaxed and rested I hummed to myself as my thoughts trailed.

Recalling the unpleasant memory of Keith, I searched for happier thoughts and I was surprised at my unconscious selection. Maria. Images of the way she bit her lips teased me. Further enticing was the way her skin felt on mine. She radiated warmth which traveled down between my thighs and caused my clit to throb. Beating like that of a heart, it pulsated aching for me to sooth the sensation.

Soon the tips of my fingers tugged against the button and zipper of my pants. They burrowed underneath my cotton laced thong. The sound of Maria’s voice saying my name made my lick my lips. The warmth between my legs excited me, but when I parted the labia shielding my inner treasure the moisture delivered me to new heights.

Extending my index finger I stroked the summit of my erection before descending deeper into the pool of liberation which saturated my inner thighs. Returning to my summit, I circle its peak. Firmly I pushed against it, stroking the sides and sliding from its top, down to the puddle below and ascending back to its top. I repeated the motion firmer and faster until my breathing paced and my moans escaped.

Heat engulfed me and is I started to orgasm a voice echoed through the hallway.

A shadow neared my office and I rushed to fasten my clothes before their arrival. Entering my office Maria said, “Ms. Kelly I-”

She paused and stared at me curiously. Sidetracked from her intended conversation she questioned, “Are you okay?”

“Of course,” I lied. “Just a little startled, I thought everyone had left for the evening.”

                “Oh?” She pondered. “Well, I’m just finishing up these documents and wanted to review them with you before I add them to our records.”

                “I’m sure they’re fine,” I replied.

                She nodded, “Sure. Okay,” and turned to exit into the narrow hallway. Sensing my uneasiness she turned to regard me once more, “Are you sure you’re okay?”

                “Absolutely,” I smiled.

She returned the expression and added, “Your hair.”

                “My hair?” I questioned.

                She pointed, “It’s sticking up.”

Sex Therapist: Introduction

The stigma associated with self-pleasure has long been an attempt to sway our self-interest and ultimate gratification. Even before conception we are drawn to the intense stimulation of masturbation. In the womb, males and females alike are drawn to the pleasures associated with a delicate rubbing or pressing of the genitals.

The vast majority of us explore our sexual desires as teenagers, quickly learning the power of touch and sound. A moan can excites us, while a touch can bring us to near orgasm. We tell ourselves there just isn’t enough time on Earth to explore what we have uncovered. And truth be told, there isn’t.

Only recently has the topic been widely open to discussion, but still many quiet the subject or avoid it all together. Countries have united to encourage masturbation, stating it is a citizen right and it will not be shunned or denied. Even so much as rallying for teenagers to engage in masturbation daily.

We people have progressed so far ahead, becoming so intellectualized we forget our basic needs. The need to orgasm.

I am an advocate for healthy sexual expression not because it is my field of work, but because the sentiment is one I truly believe. It is what makes me the best damn sex therapist in the Los Angeles area. My clients travel near and far, seeking direction and restoration of their sexless marriages.

What the court documents won’t tell you are those “irreconcilable differences” are simply a guise for “he can’t get it up” or “she’s drier than barren wasteland”.

My clients are teetering on the brinks of insanity. That is before they pick up the phone and call my office.

There are no boundaries; there are no exceptions to my job. Excluding of course the obvious, I don’t sleep with my clients. Despite requests from both men and women, it is one of my ultimate rules.  Clients who apprehensively voiced their request were newly acquired clients who thought that by bringing an additional woman in their bedroom their sex life could be restored. They were naïve and ill-informed, poor things. That misconception would be mistake number one.

Bringing a third person in your bedroom only intermittently satisfies the desires of two lovers. It is only passable to bring a third person if the relationship is solid and the sexual desires of both are abundant and fulfilled. Open relationships which have this understanding work exceptionally, however, this is rare. Most people don’t like to share.

Personally, I don’t mind it one bit.

As I pulled up to my office I observed the brightly colored Honda sedan parked in the front lot. Maria, my customer relations associate, had already arrived. Impressive. She wasn’t required to be here for another hour.

Only recently hired last week, she had already began making her imprint on me as well as my staff. She was timely and organized, but most importantly she was charismatic. She had a way with words and she made my clients feel at ease throughout their screening. The last thing they needed was to be interrogated, but the information was needed to better determine if I could help them.

Entering the building, I greeted my receptionist Alisa and proceeded towards my office. Three doors shy of my destination, Maria nearly sent my coffee airborne as she exited the mailroom and ran straight in to me.

“Ms. Kelly,” she stated unnerved, “I apologize. I didn’t see you.”

                “It’s fine,” I reassured.

                “After you,” she motioned.

While her left hand completed the forward gesture her other did something I didn’t expect. As I nodded and stepped forward she placed a hand on my lower back. Correction. It wasn’t my lower back at all, I was extenuating the offense. She touched my ass!